Yes, more tears

more. MORE!

Introducing Yes, More Tears, from the makers of No More Tears shampoo. Yes, More Tears is the perfect eye-irritating children’s shampoo for times like:

  • …your child implies or outright tells you to stop talking when you’re telling them something they need to know.

  • …when your kid starts dancing and swaying in front of the sleeping dog, who, minutes later, becomes a worked-up, biting dog.

  • …your kid says something bitchy right out of the gate, like “What’s that smell?” at dinnertime.

  • …your child screams in outrage after you gently pour a small pitcher of slightly warm water on its scalp, trying to avoid the eyes.

  • …your tween who won’t get out of bed yells at you for staying in her room to ensure that she eat breakfast and tune into school on time.

  • …your kid says “no thanks” when you ask them to help you out with something.

  • …you’re working closely with your child, trying to help them with a difficult school thing even though you have your own shit to deal with, and they tell you your breath stinks.

  • …you just really need to cry but you’re too broken to connect your thoughts and feelings and physical expressions of emotion.

  • …you’re doing bedtime after doing everything and your kid says “I wish Daddy was putting me to bed.”

  • …your kid gave you shit all day about the school’s bad Zoom connection and treated you like the world’s dumbest I.T. drone even though you have a PhD.

  • …your spouse can’t find the grownup shampoo and the last thing they said to you was something rude that was supposed to be a joke that you apparently just didn’t get.

  • …you started bedtime at 7 PM and it is now 9:45 PM.

  • …when it’s just the last fucking straw and someone in your house needs to feel a tenth of your pain,

    Jurassic Park Pain GIF

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One witchy thing

Water Sun GIF