45 Comments

I just want to add regarding the gingerbread crime scene to beware when you play monster and eat the madness at 10pm at night because what you thought were delicious M&Ms maybe be skittles and there are sour patch kids hidden under frosting and though both are great-- not on gingerbread. You'll find yourself running around your kitchen whisper-yelling "what's in my mouth?! what's in my mouth?!"

Expand full comment

When they invented the phrase "news you can use" it was about this.

Expand full comment

I definitely "launder" the Amazon & Target gift cards for my kids to buy boring household crap so they can live their froyo dreams. I also told everyone not to give the boys gift cards this year for all of the reasons you said! Thanks for another great year, Witches! My fave corner of the internet!

Expand full comment

I am 100% into laundering the card. All Amazon cards get put directly into my account and sit there for when we need something on Amazon. 95% of the time it's for one of the kids, "oh, you have a project due Wednesday that involves 150 colored feathers? no problem"

Expand full comment

I need to do that. I think I thought it would be too hard to keep track of the balance. You never know if it’s something the kids will instantly forget about, like their completed Lego set, or keep a running balance of at all times like Halloween candy

Expand full comment

For non-Amazon gift cards that I think I could use, I have been known to cash them out (deposit same amount into their savings accounts)...just to use the darn things.

Expand full comment

We use a free app to keep track of their various gift income so I can deduct it when they want to buy something with “their own money.” I put laundered gift card amounts in there too.

Expand full comment

I recently had a Gift Card Debacle. I am very bad at using gift cards but my kiddo got one from my aunt unexpectedly and so was v excited to pick out her own 25$ item at Target. The many stars finally aligned and after an interminable amount of minutes she selected an item and this gift-that-is-actually-just-another-job-for-mom was done. Only there was no actual money on the gift card and I had to buy the stupid stuffed cat. What the actual fuck Aunt Joanie?!!??!

Expand full comment

oh man!! That is my nightmare about re-gifting!! That you’d give a kid a g.c. and they’d go be excited to get the thing and they’d say at the store “Says there this card is for PAUL. Are you PAUL??” Cue the mortification that I caused.

Expand full comment

Btw, for gift cards! Your local org doing holiday gifts for kids will want these! I was asked “will you buy for teens?” and “will you buy gift cards?” as I guess these are the harder to fill categories. I bought for a group of preteen/ teen siblings, and thought about how they might be excited to pick out something for themselves, and how relieved their parent might be. 💕

Expand full comment

Thank you!! This is great to know.

Expand full comment

"Am I definitely telling you to get a facelift? Yes." lollll this is why i love you claire. EW is a blessssingggggg, it made my year better <3 <3 <3

Expand full comment

;) I love you Janet! Thanks for being a real once since we were trying to make sense out of parenting during COVID

Expand full comment

<3

Expand full comment

I had an aunt (RIP) who always sent $25 gift cards to places like Olive Garden, TGI Fridays, Red Lobster. And no shade but I don’t often get to those places, even if I joked with my friends that I could treat them to like…one appetizer before shopping at the mall. Anyway! I finally sold them to some site where you can buy and sell gift cards and I got $100+ for Amazon instead of $150 at chain restaurants. It worked great because I had a newborn at the time.

Also I always like this song from Thao called “Gift Card” - https://youtu.be/TW8HTKprC-U?si=PCfIjwri8a249GLA

Expand full comment

that’s funny—a friend texted me in response to this piece saying her brother gave her a $10 g.c. to a nice steak house. Enough to buy like one soda plus tip.

Expand full comment

Gingerbread Crime Scene House is A+++. and extra plusses for using the Andes wrappers.

Expand full comment

There was also a plastic knife stuck to it at one point but my cousin, the Coco Chanel of gingerbread houses, decided to take off one thing

Expand full comment

I can't find the hahaha emoji but that's what I'm saying.

Expand full comment

Love this, Claire! I'm so happy you put some of my ideas into action! I feel productive by association, LOL!

Expand full comment

another friend recommended donating one maybe to a school fundraiser (the kids go to Catholic school so Always Be Fundraising) which I may do. Thank you Lindsey!!

Expand full comment

Ugh I feel the same way about all of this but must have gone into a fugue state last week when I bought my kids small gift cards to local ice cream and boba shops for their stockings. I DID THIS TO MYSELFFFF. WHYYYYYYY.

Expand full comment

I hope there is a cool babysitter in town who can take them to go get those treats — who is not you

Expand full comment

I legit still cannot believe the dad at the sporrs games!! I mean i can, but i guess i am saying i am still mad about it on your behalf.

Expand full comment

haha I walk by really fast with my head down when I see him around.

did I tell you he told my dad he wished his own son was more like my son b/c mine hustles harder at baseball? That was fucked up.

Expand full comment

Eeewww!!

Expand full comment

LOLOL at Barnes and Noble’s being some fakesss toy store Trojan horse

Expand full comment

that's 88% of the world's legos come from

they also have books.

Expand full comment

Love this, as usual, but feel like chiming in about “checking in” with kids over unused gift cards… I think sometimes, sure, but sometimes who cares, how much do we do for these kids lol, so yeah use them for stuff you actually need to buy them, or their friends, and free up some drawer space. Better to use than lose! And I know for a fact we’ve lost more than a few. Happy holidays! Stay sane!

Expand full comment

the parent tax! Also applies to halloween candy

Expand full comment

My son is little but I keep asking ppl to either get us used things or just... don't get us anything. He doesn't KNOW he's missing out (he's a singleton and we don't have real TV so no commercials, lol) and we already have SO MUCH STUFF. My sister has an older son so I ask her to just send his hand-me-downs as gifts. My son doesn't know the difference between a toy firetruck that's in the box or not. Maybe it will change as he gets older but I'm REALLY hoping I can keep this vibe moving forward.

Expand full comment

That is ideal. I appreciated the mom who invited us a few years ago to give her kid anything lightly used that we don’t need. My mom in particular uses shopping as her love language. It’s not such a huge deal that I needed to stage an intervention but I could have lived without her buying them little gifties for Halloween for instance. But grandmas gonna grandma

Expand full comment

We started gifting gift cards in recent years because we were so highly aware that we didn't want more stuff (especially stuff that we already had or things our kids didn't like) and felt more comfortable letting families determine how they want to proceed with them. I am not offended if they are redristributed in any way. We currently give gift cards to our local independent children's bookstore so we can support a local business. Our kids love gift cards (we do direct the gift givers as to where to buy gift cards, usually local businesses but sometimes the Lego store) and we make a thing out of it, where we go to the store together and have food and such.

Expand full comment

good tip!

Expand full comment
Dec 18Edited

When my oldest was a baby I belonged to a baby mamma coven. We regifted the same movie gift card for each other's birthdays. It wasn't until it came back to the original giver that we realized what happened. She ended up giving it to the cinephile Priest at our Church. 18 years later, we still laugh about it. You can always donate the gift cards.

Expand full comment

That’s cute. I need to get rid of these Cold Stone gift cards most importantly. I need to figure out who out there wants to eat ice cream that’s been spread around on the counter.

Expand full comment

We use most of our gift cards fairly quickly but I have had a cold stone one for years!

Expand full comment

I feel like ice cream is one of those things where you’re rarely like “Let’s plan upon getting ice cream. I shall leave the house now and we will drive to the ice cream store; get the gift card.” It’s more of a ‘Fuck it we need ice cream now!!’ thing

Expand full comment
Dec 18Edited

Consider donating to Rice/Lydia House. They try to take the inpatient kids on as many outings as possible.

Expand full comment

Thank you! Good call

Expand full comment

Tiny bummer: postal carriers (USPS) are subject to government gift rules and may not be allowed to keep gift cards you give them. (Food’s a good substitute bc they can share at the office worst case.)

Expand full comment

Ah good to know—I’ll double check what I can give. I need to also somehow secretly find our postal carrier’s name. I ask her once a year and then forget and feel like a huge tool. If only once a day I got to look at her name and address.

Expand full comment

I leave cash...anyway? And figure, if nobody knows then nobody minds. fingers crossed

Expand full comment

Sometimes my kids get cash as a gift and they leave it around the house and after a certain number of days I just take it. If you don’t care about it then it’s mine.

Expand full comment