Sharing this for women's history month! My great-grandmother had 14 children. Getting her tubes tied—or just saying no to sex—was not an option. As it happened, she cleaned the office of an OB/GYN. Together they decided that my grandma needed an "emergency appendectomy" that was, in reality, a tubal ligation. That doctor was a real one, and Grandma Thompson was a #shero
Thanks to your friend for sharing her story. I know your friend said the one thing she could have done differently is complain about the IUD and the bleeding but I hope she doesn’t dwell on that. Fact of the matter is that women’s health is just so poorly handled that we, frankly, don’t even know *how/when* to complain.
Wow, thanks to you and your friend for sharing all this -- we desperately need more of these stories out in the open. I am filing this away for future reference! Random comment but I, too, had the vagal response after getting an IUD inserted and almost fainted in the parking lot, which wasn't great because I was by myself. After a little while I learned to love it (it stopped my periods) but then I had to get it removed because my husband said it poked him during sex. I guess my story does have a happy ending (ha) though because he ended up getting a vasectomy.
My wife had really heavy menstruation, with terrible cramps (sometimes needing to stay home from work it was so bad). After we had our son and decided to close up shop she had an ablation, on the advice of my sister who had one. It was the best thing she ever did. She hasn’t had a period in over 20 years, no cramping, no bleeding, not even really PMS. She has had a lot of health issues so it was really nice not to have to deal with a period as well.
Ooooh, I am in the thick of this right now. Ablation scheduled for end of April, pending fibroid check. After my second kid I started bleeding so, so much. My iron stores are a joke, in spite of supplements. Keep everything crossed for me that this works y'all! I'm really hoping to avoid surgery (because I've already had a ton of procedures for other stuff).
This is all so interesting to hear! I had the exact opposite experience from your friend, I think the hormonal IUD has helped me massively! I got the Mirena after my second kid and the insertion barely hurt at all and I’m sensitive and had it inserted like 6 weeks after birth. And (when I eventually let him near me lol) my husband could feel the strings and I just went back to the midwife and they cut them shorter.
I had/still have ZERO periods with the iud. I used to pass out from cramps as a teen, now nothing. Most importantly though, near the end of my IUD’s life span (but still not the official FDA end), I started having these mood swings, was feeling depressed at random times, more like terrible PMS. my midwife said sometimes the amount of hormone released can dwindle a bit near the end, so I got another one inserted and it was like magic- no more mood swings. The midwife said that many women like the iud later into their 40s and 50s because it can help control perimenopause symptoms. So anyway, I know everyone’s experience is different but my IUD experience has been great!
Claire, have you done anything on hormone levels/HRT? I had a great conversation with two women at my gym the other day about it, and I was like, oh, I should get my hormone levels checked, but I'm not sure I really know what that means. would love an Evil Witches take on it, if that interests you! (apologies if you've done this and I missed it!)
Lots of women need pain medication during IUD insertion/removal! It doesn't mean anything's wrong with you, bodies are vastly different! I just read Dr. Gunter's book Blood and saw her speak last Friday (she lives in the States but is a hometown hero here in Canada). Fantastic stuff.
I had a tubal, with great success, but I still have to be on the pill to manage my period.
I've heard SO MANY terrible stories about getting an IUD inserted. As someone who is fairly sensitive I was expecting it to be the worst and.....it was totally nothing. In terms of pain/discomfort it was barely a pinch and then it was over. Sharing to say if you're feeling anxious about getting one, every body is different and it is possible to have a no-big-deal experience as well. But I feel for all the ladies who did not have this experience and it seems like a big enough issue that doctors should care a little more?! I did hear from a friend who was offered nitrous oxide before hers and I can't stop thinking about that. It seems like that should be a standard offer for those who want it!
I had no idea a vaginal hysterectomy existed! How cool. I LOLed at putting the doctor's note on the fridge - that is gold star behavior right there.
I hope things settle down for you, Claire. I've had three (3) IUDs and insertion *for me* was like 2x a pap smear + gagging, but the second hormonal one turned me into an absolute monster and I didn't catch on until it was time to replace it five years later (I have the copper one now).
I wish women's healthcare wasn't so, "Every woman's different, shrug" and was more, "Every woman's different, so if what you're saying is new to me, I'm going to believe you."
So I started this out like, “I’ve had two IUDs in my life…” and then started counting and I think I’ve actually had… 4? Is this perimenopausal brain fog?? 1 paraguard in my 20s (profoundly painful), 1 mirena for three months after my first birth (got that mofo taken out bc of the sheer rage I felt all the time), replaced by paraguard (#3), then… like, I cannot for the life of me remember what my birth control post second birth was? Must have been another paraguard? A year-ish after our second, my husband had a vasectomy, which was a year-ish too late, IMO, but he was a big wuss about it and cancelled the first appt bc… he had a headache. Yes, I was as relentlessly jeering about that one as you can imagine.
This is epic. Thank you so much for sharing. The story of her miscarriage, too, and her realization that she might have kept trying, that's just really hard and makes me so mad.
I had a Paragard inserted before I'd ever been pregnant, and even with the cervical softener the insertion hurt. I didn't pass out, but I felt lightheaded and had to stay lying down for a few extra minutes. And I bled, heavily, for two weeks after insertion, then heavily for a full week every month while I had it. The insertion made me scared of getting it removed, but that was actually just a quick pinch, really easy.
6 weeks post-childbirth I got a Mirena, and I felt nothing. Zip. Zilch. My OB-GYN was like "done!" and I was like, wait, seriously? That's it? When the Mirena ran out I replaced it with a Liletta, and I didn't feel that insertion at all, either, even though I was most definitely not 6 weeks postpartum.
Both the Mirena and the Liletta have been a dream, I haven't had a period since the one my OB-GYN asked for the date of when I went in to get my pregnancy confirmed. I very occasionally have extremely mild cramping, so light I often misattribute it to gas pain or something. Once or twice, in 8 years, I've had the tiniest amount of spotting, but that's it.
I can't WAIT to have a hysterectomy! I definitely commiserate with your friend. Heavy periods for years, then I got a Mirena but it made me crazy(crazier?) and had it taken out. After my second kid at age 39, I got the coils (Essure?) and then got an ablation (Novasure?) and STILL HAD PERIODS. Yes. Lighter but still significant. I finally started menopause a year ago and am now graduated to post-menopausal. I'm considering HRT if my doc thinks it will be beneficial, but also would be totally fine with cleaning out the basement. Being a woman is BUILT IN HARD WORK and I'm always bullshit about anyone who says otherwise.
Sharing this for women's history month! My great-grandmother had 14 children. Getting her tubes tied—or just saying no to sex—was not an option. As it happened, she cleaned the office of an OB/GYN. Together they decided that my grandma needed an "emergency appendectomy" that was, in reality, a tubal ligation. That doctor was a real one, and Grandma Thompson was a #shero
Thanks to your friend for sharing her story. I know your friend said the one thing she could have done differently is complain about the IUD and the bleeding but I hope she doesn’t dwell on that. Fact of the matter is that women’s health is just so poorly handled that we, frankly, don’t even know *how/when* to complain.
Wow, thanks to you and your friend for sharing all this -- we desperately need more of these stories out in the open. I am filing this away for future reference! Random comment but I, too, had the vagal response after getting an IUD inserted and almost fainted in the parking lot, which wasn't great because I was by myself. After a little while I learned to love it (it stopped my periods) but then I had to get it removed because my husband said it poked him during sex. I guess my story does have a happy ending (ha) though because he ended up getting a vasectomy.
My wife had really heavy menstruation, with terrible cramps (sometimes needing to stay home from work it was so bad). After we had our son and decided to close up shop she had an ablation, on the advice of my sister who had one. It was the best thing she ever did. She hasn’t had a period in over 20 years, no cramping, no bleeding, not even really PMS. She has had a lot of health issues so it was really nice not to have to deal with a period as well.
Ooooh, I am in the thick of this right now. Ablation scheduled for end of April, pending fibroid check. After my second kid I started bleeding so, so much. My iron stores are a joke, in spite of supplements. Keep everything crossed for me that this works y'all! I'm really hoping to avoid surgery (because I've already had a ton of procedures for other stuff).
This is all so interesting to hear! I had the exact opposite experience from your friend, I think the hormonal IUD has helped me massively! I got the Mirena after my second kid and the insertion barely hurt at all and I’m sensitive and had it inserted like 6 weeks after birth. And (when I eventually let him near me lol) my husband could feel the strings and I just went back to the midwife and they cut them shorter.
I had/still have ZERO periods with the iud. I used to pass out from cramps as a teen, now nothing. Most importantly though, near the end of my IUD’s life span (but still not the official FDA end), I started having these mood swings, was feeling depressed at random times, more like terrible PMS. my midwife said sometimes the amount of hormone released can dwindle a bit near the end, so I got another one inserted and it was like magic- no more mood swings. The midwife said that many women like the iud later into their 40s and 50s because it can help control perimenopause symptoms. So anyway, I know everyone’s experience is different but my IUD experience has been great!
Ok this was great
Claire, have you done anything on hormone levels/HRT? I had a great conversation with two women at my gym the other day about it, and I was like, oh, I should get my hormone levels checked, but I'm not sure I really know what that means. would love an Evil Witches take on it, if that interests you! (apologies if you've done this and I missed it!)
Lots of women need pain medication during IUD insertion/removal! It doesn't mean anything's wrong with you, bodies are vastly different! I just read Dr. Gunter's book Blood and saw her speak last Friday (she lives in the States but is a hometown hero here in Canada). Fantastic stuff.
I had a tubal, with great success, but I still have to be on the pill to manage my period.
I've heard SO MANY terrible stories about getting an IUD inserted. As someone who is fairly sensitive I was expecting it to be the worst and.....it was totally nothing. In terms of pain/discomfort it was barely a pinch and then it was over. Sharing to say if you're feeling anxious about getting one, every body is different and it is possible to have a no-big-deal experience as well. But I feel for all the ladies who did not have this experience and it seems like a big enough issue that doctors should care a little more?! I did hear from a friend who was offered nitrous oxide before hers and I can't stop thinking about that. It seems like that should be a standard offer for those who want it!
I had no idea a vaginal hysterectomy existed! How cool. I LOLed at putting the doctor's note on the fridge - that is gold star behavior right there.
I hope things settle down for you, Claire. I've had three (3) IUDs and insertion *for me* was like 2x a pap smear + gagging, but the second hormonal one turned me into an absolute monster and I didn't catch on until it was time to replace it five years later (I have the copper one now).
I wish women's healthcare wasn't so, "Every woman's different, shrug" and was more, "Every woman's different, so if what you're saying is new to me, I'm going to believe you."
So I started this out like, “I’ve had two IUDs in my life…” and then started counting and I think I’ve actually had… 4? Is this perimenopausal brain fog?? 1 paraguard in my 20s (profoundly painful), 1 mirena for three months after my first birth (got that mofo taken out bc of the sheer rage I felt all the time), replaced by paraguard (#3), then… like, I cannot for the life of me remember what my birth control post second birth was? Must have been another paraguard? A year-ish after our second, my husband had a vasectomy, which was a year-ish too late, IMO, but he was a big wuss about it and cancelled the first appt bc… he had a headache. Yes, I was as relentlessly jeering about that one as you can imagine.
This is epic. Thank you so much for sharing. The story of her miscarriage, too, and her realization that she might have kept trying, that's just really hard and makes me so mad.
I had a uterine biopsy and I passed out from the pain. The only thing I was told was to take some ibuprofen beforehand. I’m so mad about it.
I guarantee that if a man was having a chunk of their insides cut out, he would be sedated all the way unconscious.
I had a Paragard inserted before I'd ever been pregnant, and even with the cervical softener the insertion hurt. I didn't pass out, but I felt lightheaded and had to stay lying down for a few extra minutes. And I bled, heavily, for two weeks after insertion, then heavily for a full week every month while I had it. The insertion made me scared of getting it removed, but that was actually just a quick pinch, really easy.
6 weeks post-childbirth I got a Mirena, and I felt nothing. Zip. Zilch. My OB-GYN was like "done!" and I was like, wait, seriously? That's it? When the Mirena ran out I replaced it with a Liletta, and I didn't feel that insertion at all, either, even though I was most definitely not 6 weeks postpartum.
Both the Mirena and the Liletta have been a dream, I haven't had a period since the one my OB-GYN asked for the date of when I went in to get my pregnancy confirmed. I very occasionally have extremely mild cramping, so light I often misattribute it to gas pain or something. Once or twice, in 8 years, I've had the tiniest amount of spotting, but that's it.
I can't WAIT to have a hysterectomy! I definitely commiserate with your friend. Heavy periods for years, then I got a Mirena but it made me crazy(crazier?) and had it taken out. After my second kid at age 39, I got the coils (Essure?) and then got an ablation (Novasure?) and STILL HAD PERIODS. Yes. Lighter but still significant. I finally started menopause a year ago and am now graduated to post-menopausal. I'm considering HRT if my doc thinks it will be beneficial, but also would be totally fine with cleaning out the basement. Being a woman is BUILT IN HARD WORK and I'm always bullshit about anyone who says otherwise.