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Nov 10, 2021Liked by Claire Zulkey

I’m also a one-and-done-r for the same reasons as Leslie. I am still shocked that in 2021, having one child is a choice I have to frequently justify or explain to people. I also think there’s something interesting going on with language here; I dislike the term “only child“ as “only“ implies some sort of lack, so I try to avoid using it.

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Oct 28, 2022Liked by Claire Zulkey

Thank you for this. I love the line that says “having a kid is committing to a long term relationship with someone you don’t know yet” so true!

I also agree that we are still surrounded by people who sing praises to families of more than one child and a close age gap. I waisted so much time worrying about the age gap.

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All of this. I have always had a weird connection with only children and had a sense that if I became a mother, we'd be one and done, too. Sometimes it feels like having one kid is tinged with regret/trauma/pain (though I understand that happens) or the narrative is "we ran out of time" or "we couldn't have another" instead of "this is awesome and I love it."

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I am an only child and I loved it. Only once did I inquire about a sister to which I was educated that I would get fewer dance classes etc bc my sister would be afforded her own activities as well, then I retracted my request. I related well to adults and friends. I always had pets. The only caveat is that it made having roommates much harder. I also could've been told no more 😂 often growing up too. My mom is an exceptional mother and was beloved by all my dance friends. I know I will care for her and my dad well whenever their health requires- there is no rationing of elder care. My husband is a fourth child and does have somewhat better relational skills due to navigating the constant sibling bickering etc. I do like being able to ask his older sisters things/advice since they all have children and are done having more. He is very insistent on having two children not one. We will see how that all goes.

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Gloria are you me?!?! The one kid. The never again it will break me (more than this one did). The school full of manys! The kid who would not poop in a potty for way too long!! Thank you for this! Thank you Claire for this!

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