I cannot hit like enough on this. Husband as common law best friend is PERFECT! And I have always had my heart broken the hardest by friends and friend breakups. There's so much freight and pop cultural weight attached to having a ride or die bestie and the reality is so much messier. I mourned for years when my high school BFF clearly moved on without me and had so much resentment towards her. It took me a long time to process how inappropriate and selfish of me to resent her for living a life she loved that didn't feature me in a starring role. Prior to her I, a nerdy and deeply uncool kid, had a series of toxic more popular elementary/middle school best friends that I honestly am still recovering from.
I cannot hit like enough on this. Husband as common law best friend is PERFECT! And I have always had my heart broken the hardest by friends and friend breakups. There's so much freight and pop cultural weight attached to having a ride or die bestie and the reality is so much messier. I mourned for years when my high school BFF clearly moved on without me and had so much resentment towards her. It took me a long time to process how inappropriate and selfish of me to resent her for living a life she loved that didn't feature me in a starring role. Prior to her I, a nerdy and deeply uncool kid, had a series of toxic more popular elementary/middle school best friends that I honestly am still recovering from.
This newsletter is really, really good. I'm going to be thinking about it for a long time
I like Mindy Kaling's assessment in an early Mindy Project episode - "best friend is a level, not a person."