wrote me, “I had a random thought. I would like more funny t shirts that are not, like, crappy wine mom things (and not necessarily mom-related). Have you ever asked for recs like that in Evil Witches?”
No, and this is the best question ever. Let’s normalize funny not-necesarily-mom-related t-shirts for moms.
I myself have one that says “I don't want any writing just leave the t-shirt blank” because I saw a witch on Instagram wearing one that was cut very flatteringly and I was like I see it, I like it, I want it, I got it (yeah). And I have another one that says “I tried” so I could put it on the days I get a call from school telling me my child has not been an angel (or any other time I need to remind myself that I tried.)
What have you got? Forget swapping recipes and talking about our dumb kids: let’s just get stupid today.
My husband and I once saw a woman walking down the street with a shirt that says “you’ve mistaken me for someone who wants to talk to you” and we still laugh about it
For my birthday, my husband took my hint and bought me a t-shirt that said: GOD GRANT ME THE SERENITY TO ACCEPT THE VIBES THAT AREN'T ROOTIN TOOTIN (https://shorturl.at/lzN78). It is perfect.
Spirit Halloween has a surprisingly good selection of t-shirts this year. I'm not usually one for a silly graphic tee, but I bought TWO: Easy Bake Coven (with illustration of tween girls around a tiny floating oven conjuring pentagram pies) and Adopt a Familiar - Black Cat Animal Rescue (in a very Stranger Things font with owl, black cat, rat, crow, hare, and toad). I absolutely plan to wear them year-round.
I once saw a woman in a foreign country walking down the street with a shirt that said "pizza tits" and had the pizza hut logo. I desperately wish I owned that shirt.
I saw someone wearing a t-shirt that said "Uninspiring disabled person". I felt that! (Many people tell me my son is "inspiring", I'm always curious what exactly he's inspiring them to do!)
"Be Gay, Do Crime", purchased after a parent at the school where I teach insisted that we shouldn't have an LGBT student group because it was "illegal". 😅 I don't wear it to work but I channel its energy on a daily basis.
Literally anything made by Raygun. You want shirts that make fun of Chicago, KC, Iowa, Nebraska and their various sportsball teams? They’ve got you. Want something making fun of politicians? They’ve got those too. I swear half my wardrobe are shirts from them https://www.raygunsite.com/collections/t-shirts-1
My favorite shirt says “Eat your veggies, bitch.” I was bummed when my kids learned to read and I couldn’t wear it around them, now that they’re older I’m bringing it back!
When I was pregnant, I had a maternity tshirt that said “Ice Ice” on it. Both ices stacked on top of eachother. I was wearing it when I was probably 8 months or so along, and I walked past people eating at the sidewalk tables of a neighborhood restaurant and a stranger applauded me.
My "sober feminist buzzkill" shirt is the most true expression I own. There's also a woman I see around town with a shirt that says "I will put you in my trunk and help people look for you. Stop playing with me." Gets me every time (and a little scared lol.)
Most of my tees are just pop culture references and I am kind of jealous of all of these comments. I do have a "Blame John Waters" shirt that I wear a lot but as much as I think all of these things in my head, I am super prudish about wearing shirts that have foul language on them and also don't want to invite attention from other people unless it is to complement me because the shirt I am wearing is from a television show or movie they recognize.
A couple years ago I sought out and bought a t-shirt that says “Al Dente.” It brings me joy because it’s random and trivial. In a time when it can feel exhausting and demoralizing to take a stance on anything, I feel quite good about coming out strong against soggy pasta.
Love this topic. I have supplied my husband with an entire wardrobe of funny tees and have a couple of my own. My favorite:
“ ‘That’s what’ -She”
I also have one that just says “Nope. Not today” that i find useful for those kinds of days. I have one that says “NAP” but in the Gap signature logo style.
I need to plug this WIERDO shirt: https://loudflowerartco.com/collections/weirdos Most importantly, it's very soft. Second most importantly, Madi (the artist) makes it in kids sizes, so now my kids are appropriately labeled. Thank you, Madi.
I have Jessica Valenti’s Abortion, Everyday’s T shirt that says: “Abortion Bans can fu*ck off into the sun”. Also more than one Ween AND Steely Dan T-shirt. All of these things are important to me! LOL
I wear Pizza John tees, which are sold yearly as a charity fundraiser by a niche internet fandom. If someone else is in the same internet community, they strike up a conversation, and if they’re not, it reads as weird / quirky so only other weird / quirky types talk to me. Win-win!
This is only available on a bucket hat which is why I haven't pulled the trigger but I appreciate the sentiment. I deeply, deeply, DEEPLY wish it was on a tee shirt that I would wear standing next to my husband at his middle age white man concerts. Plus the store name is just . . . 10/10.
Not a shirt, but I have a tote that says "Men have made a lot of bad art."
I own this one even though I do, in fact, want revenge: https://www.amazon.com/Youre-Lucky-Women-Equality-Revenge/dp/B0C71N4C5M
https://www.effinbirds.com/collections/womens-shirts
I pretty much want all of these, but my favorite is “Feminism is for everyone, dipshit.”
This artist, Molly Colleen O'Connell, is a friend of a friend and her "Feral MILF No Morals" shirt is so so so so good and v. appropriate for this community: https://poetyunlimited.bigcartel.com/product/feral-milf-no-morals-tee
My husband and I once saw a woman walking down the street with a shirt that says “you’ve mistaken me for someone who wants to talk to you” and we still laugh about it
Dr. Pepper is a Woman https://www.bonfire.com/dr-pepper-is-a-woman/
I own this Elizabeth Warren campaign shirt: "She's Electable if you Fucking Vote 4 Her" https://medium.com/@lisa.oneill/shes-electable-if-you-vote-4-her-an-interview-with-artist-jackie-ann-ruiz-c6c14d36164
On first reading, I thought your t-shirt said "I tired," and I very much felt that.
For my birthday, my husband took my hint and bought me a t-shirt that said: GOD GRANT ME THE SERENITY TO ACCEPT THE VIBES THAT AREN'T ROOTIN TOOTIN (https://shorturl.at/lzN78). It is perfect.
Spirit Halloween has a surprisingly good selection of t-shirts this year. I'm not usually one for a silly graphic tee, but I bought TWO: Easy Bake Coven (with illustration of tween girls around a tiny floating oven conjuring pentagram pies) and Adopt a Familiar - Black Cat Animal Rescue (in a very Stranger Things font with owl, black cat, rat, crow, hare, and toad). I absolutely plan to wear them year-round.
I haven't bought it yet, but I think of it often. "Surviving Purely Out of Spite."
https://www.wickedclothes.com/products/purely-spite-shirt?pb=0
Did school dropoff in this one the other day. Love to confuse tf out of the other parents. https://thegoodshirts.com/products/who-drink-arnorl-palmer?_pos=1&_psq=arnol&_ss=e&_v=1.0
I got a "like flowers we will fade" tee w a ghost on it from Sad Beige that I really like -
https://www.bonfire.com/like-flowers-we-will-fade/
but recommend sizing UP UP UP bc cropped (why cropped) and shrunk in wash
there are some goodies there now - I kind of want a "nobody likes ted cruz" tee
https://www.bonfire.com/store/sadbeige/
I got a black t shirt at Forever 21 at least ten years ago that just says NO THANKS on the front. Multipurpose!
I once saw a woman in a foreign country walking down the street with a shirt that said "pizza tits" and had the pizza hut logo. I desperately wish I owned that shirt.
I saw someone wearing a t-shirt that said "Uninspiring disabled person". I felt that! (Many people tell me my son is "inspiring", I'm always curious what exactly he's inspiring them to do!)
My Love Language Is Silence.
https://shop.getbullish.com/products/my-love-language-is-silence-unisex-heavy-blend-hooded-sweatshirt-sizes-s-5xl
I love the Bullish store generally for all sorts of snarky funny everything
“I came to Texas for an abortion and all I got was disenfranchised. And this lousy t-shirt.”
I’m currently traveling in Texas and I want this now.
Don’t have yet, but definitely need: https://www.raygunsite.com/collections/t-shirts-1/products/eat-the-yachts
I have this Satanic Celine Dion t-shirt: https://www.teepublic.com/t-shirt/18791961-celin-dion
"Be Gay, Do Crime", purchased after a parent at the school where I teach insisted that we shouldn't have an LGBT student group because it was "illegal". 😅 I don't wear it to work but I channel its energy on a daily basis.
I think this thread might finally inspire me to pull the trigger on this one: https://www.etsy.com/listing/1484814706
Not a shirt, but a friend has a cross-stitch sampler that says "Bless Doing Less" and I love it.
I love this Etsy store and could order a dozen of these tees:
https://www.etsy.com/shop/JustinsShirtStore?ref=shop-header-name&listing_id=1416272875&from_page=listing
I wear this one to PT, kids birthday parties, school drop off, etc: https://girrlscoutshop.com/products/im-tired-limited-edition-vintage-tee
IT’S FINE
I’M FINE
EVERYTHING IS FINE
https://www.etsy.com/listing/968242291/its-fine-im-fine-everything-is-fine?gpla=1&gao=1&&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=shopping_us_ps-e-clothing-other&utm_custom1=_k_CjwKCAjw-eKpBhAbEiwAqFL0mt_Ec5rJop1eqkapGr1FRmgDTnF8-kC-J19i1FD_JtN_teV2LoX6jBoClwkQAvD_BwE_k_&utm_content=go_12565309642_118771236159_507187468503_aud-1184785539978:pla-297616371983_c__968242291_348680078&utm_custom2=12565309642&gclid=CjwKCAjw-eKpBhAbEiwAqFL0mt_Ec5rJop1eqkapGr1FRmgDTnF8-kC-J19i1FD_JtN_teV2LoX6jBoClwkQAvD_BwE
I love this one with three witches riding their brooms that reads "Girls Will Be Girls: - https://www.boredwalk.com/collections/ladies-tshirts/products/womens-girls-will-be-girls-witch-t-shirt
Literally anything made by Raygun. You want shirts that make fun of Chicago, KC, Iowa, Nebraska and their various sportsball teams? They’ve got you. Want something making fun of politicians? They’ve got those too. I swear half my wardrobe are shirts from them https://www.raygunsite.com/collections/t-shirts-1
My favorite shirt says “Eat your veggies, bitch.” I was bummed when my kids learned to read and I couldn’t wear it around them, now that they’re older I’m bringing it back!
My only current one, which is very old but I love as a redhead, says "Redheads have more fun."
I used to have a pin that said "Women who think they are equal to men lack ambition" which I had wished was a shirt.
Mom related, but witchy - "Weird Mother" shirts from Drawings by Nicole, lots of good ones to choose from:
https://drawingsbynicole.com/products/weird-mother-shirt-in-black-s-xl?_pos=28&_sid=9f7130c33&_ss=r
https://drawingsbynicole.com/products/weird-mother-explosion-shirt?_pos=26&_sid=9f7130c33&_ss=r
https://drawingsbynicole.com/products/weird-mother-stranger-things-mashup-black-shirt-s-xxxl?_pos=5&_sid=9f7130c33&_ss=r
When I was pregnant, I had a maternity tshirt that said “Ice Ice” on it. Both ices stacked on top of eachother. I was wearing it when I was probably 8 months or so along, and I walked past people eating at the sidewalk tables of a neighborhood restaurant and a stranger applauded me.
My "sober feminist buzzkill" shirt is the most true expression I own. There's also a woman I see around town with a shirt that says "I will put you in my trunk and help people look for you. Stop playing with me." Gets me every time (and a little scared lol.)
I once saw a parent at school drop off with a t shirt that just said “why?” I think about it every weekday morning.
Did not know I needed this thread so very very much
How about no? https://www.teeturtle.com/products/how-about-no?variant=19577791488151
This one has been around for a minute but I got this riff on the YALE shirt for a friend from Mississippi
https://kyforky.com/collections/t-shirts/products/yall-t-shirt-blue
Most of my tees are just pop culture references and I am kind of jealous of all of these comments. I do have a "Blame John Waters" shirt that I wear a lot but as much as I think all of these things in my head, I am super prudish about wearing shirts that have foul language on them and also don't want to invite attention from other people unless it is to complement me because the shirt I am wearing is from a television show or movie they recognize.
My husband bought me one from a comic artist that said “ask me about my feminist agenda.” Love it. https://womenwriteaboutcomics.com/2016/10/ask-them-about-their-feminist-agenda-marvel-mockingbird/
I'm so tired of trying 😭
https://www.wickedclothes.com/products/tired-of-trying-shirt
A couple years ago I sought out and bought a t-shirt that says “Al Dente.” It brings me joy because it’s random and trivial. In a time when it can feel exhausting and demoralizing to take a stance on anything, I feel quite good about coming out strong against soggy pasta.
Love this topic. I have supplied my husband with an entire wardrobe of funny tees and have a couple of my own. My favorite:
“ ‘That’s what’ -She”
I also have one that just says “Nope. Not today” that i find useful for those kinds of days. I have one that says “NAP” but in the Gap signature logo style.
My all time favorite shirt https://amzn.to/497uVlK
There's an old-school one I've loved for years: "Girls don't like boys, girls like aliens and Dana Scully" - and a cheap dupe on Amazon that I'd buy if it weren't ripping off the original artist, which reads, hilariously, "Girls don't like boys, girl like aliens and Dana Scully". Anyway, here's the orig: https://www.wish.com/product/girls-dont-like-boys-girls-like-aliens-and-dana-scully-mens-t-shirt-men-clothing-print-custom-t-shirt--men-funny-tops-tees-5ab475d1c7e80b7aaf8f1d3c
I need to plug this WIERDO shirt: https://loudflowerartco.com/collections/weirdos Most importantly, it's very soft. Second most importantly, Madi (the artist) makes it in kids sizes, so now my kids are appropriately labeled. Thank you, Madi.
I'm going to rep a couple locals here:
https://www.realsaltydesignco.com/shop/clothing - "Not the Worst Mom" and "I Hate People"
https://happyland.shop/collections/crewnecks - "Society of Junior Grannies - Youthfully Mastering The Dark Arts of the Geriatric"
I have Jessica Valenti’s Abortion, Everyday’s T shirt that says: “Abortion Bans can fu*ck off into the sun”. Also more than one Ween AND Steely Dan T-shirt. All of these things are important to me! LOL
I wear Pizza John tees, which are sold yearly as a charity fundraiser by a niche internet fandom. If someone else is in the same internet community, they strike up a conversation, and if they’re not, it reads as weird / quirky so only other weird / quirky types talk to me. Win-win!
This thread could not be more perfectly timed. My book club's holiday party is buying one person a funny t-shirt. Following closely!
This is only available on a bucket hat which is why I haven't pulled the trigger but I appreciate the sentiment. I deeply, deeply, DEEPLY wish it was on a tee shirt that I would wear standing next to my husband at his middle age white man concerts. Plus the store name is just . . . 10/10.
https://patriarchysworstnightmare.com/collections/garms/products/the-good-pussy-hat