39 Comments
Sep 15Liked by Claire Zulkey

The Mrs. Ron DeSantis part killed me.

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if I were a tradwife I would think long and hard about replying sincerely to my husband's text asking if he should stop and see a scenic geyser while on his work trip instead of just replying "Yolo"

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TWO PERIODS A MONTH my sister in christ what the HELL

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I'm deceased. Thank you.

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I think I fell all the way in love with you today

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Sep 15Liked by Claire Zulkey

"I would finally be able to have the beautiful baby girl of my dreams to be my helper and one true friend, or maybe four more boys, which would also be a blessing." LOL

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Sep 15Liked by Claire Zulkey

This was SO good. I cannot pick a favorite line, but this was one of them: “or when the apocalypse comes (god willing!)”

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Sep 15Liked by Claire Zulkey

You forgot the biggest skill of the #tradwife. Getting all those sponsors to pay for her ability to be home and be beautiful.

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Sep 15Liked by Claire Zulkey

I’ve consumed a lot of trad wife content from writers I love and respect lately, but this is by far my favorite.

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Sep 15Liked by Claire Zulkey

Housework before bed. Oh hell no.

Also “That’s right. I said boy.”

Thanks for getting my TGIF off to a good start.

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Sep 15Liked by Claire Zulkey

I couldn’t decide on a favorite bit - each time, I’d keep reading and you kept delivering.

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Sep 15Liked by Claire Zulkey

WOW was this one a great read - I am dying laughing, thank you Claire!!!!

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Sep 15Liked by Claire Zulkey

This made me laugh so hard. The calling your husband on business trips made me think of how last week when my husband was on a business trip it occurred to me that maybe I should call him on his second night away. Then, I thought, hey, he could call me. We're good. The best part about the trad wives is they are actually working moms, aren't they? Bitches.

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My approach to the Tonka toys: They stayed in the corner of the yard, by the hedges, exactly where someone left them one day, for years and years and years, while the boys grew up. I kinda got attached to them there: you know, the visible symbol that I once had boys who played w Tonka trucks in that little corner. And then, when I sold the house & was finally forced to deal them, I picked them up & threw them in the garbage. (B/c 20 yrs of rain, wind, & snow are not kind to Tonka trucks) ;)

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Sep 15Liked by Claire Zulkey

"I would magically be good at styling my hair with heating tools." <-- my forever dream.

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Sep 15Liked by Claire Zulkey

HA! As someone who has also had fantasies about living the north shore life of "fake people I made up," this was both hilarious and highly relatable!

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