5 Comments
Sep 8, 2021Liked by Claire Zulkey

Don't forget possible developmental issues. Age 16-months to about age 4 are known as my youngest's "terrorist years". We could not go a day without at least 3 meltdowns. Despite all the assurances about "terrible twos" and recommendations, I knew something wasn't right.

At age 4 she was diagnosed with receptive and expressive language disorder and at 9 she FINALLY received a double diagnosis of ADHD/Autism (many girls are misdiagnosed because the evaluation criteria id skewed toward boys, but that's another rant.) Luckily, the supports she was receiving through school and her therapist was exactly what was needed for her new diagnosis.

We are lucky. Had this been another time or if I had not worked in the education/mental health field, she probably would have been labeled as a "bad" kid. It's hard for some parents to acknowledge the possibility that their kid is not neurotypical. However, if things are not getting better, I always encourage parents to get a thorough neuropsych evaluation. The earlier in interventions, the better the outcome for your kid.

Expand full comment
author

Thank you!! Glad to include this perspective. I also wonder if her being the second child also helped too. When you have your first you don't know what end is up.

Expand full comment

I was literally coming in here to say if you have neurodivergent kiddos I hope you are being kind with yourself after reading these super helpful suggestions. Which are great but if you’re like me you’re going to try all of them with very limited success. 😂

But also if you do have kids like that it gets, if not better, at least different. My oldest is such a better communicator now that he’s 4. And my youngest, who was a saint when my oldest was going through a tough phase, is now a little pill. So it all happens in cycles and you’re going to be okay.

Expand full comment
Sep 8, 2021Liked by Claire Zulkey

Just popped in in response to so many endorsements for 1,2,3 Magic. I was in a booth next to the author of this book at a childhood psych conference and for 3 straight days practitioners and clinicians and therapists lined up at his booth to praise him and tell him how life-changing this book has been for their patients and families. He was a lovely man to boot and let me prattle on about my own pre-tween challenges with my son.

Expand full comment
author

I really like 123 Magic. It speaks to my personality as a parent and doesn't try to make children seem more special or magical than I'm in the mood for. I like how it lays bare that it's much more pleasant to parent when your kids are easy to parent.

Expand full comment