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1) My school librarian friend answers parents this when they ask her when their kids should have cell phones: when you are ready for them to see porn.

2) The putting of things in the dishwasher is 100% the most enraging chore for me, and I am just stunned that someone with such a male-sounding name did that, since everyone knows your penis FALLS OFF COMPLETELY when you load or unload a dishwasher WHAT THAT IS THE ONLY POSSIBLE EXPLANATION FOR WHY MY HUSBAND NEVER DOES IT

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^thus

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the dishwasher photo gave me rage 😂

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Alas! I remember the sweet, sweet, sweet days when I sat my 12 year old nephew, Berry, down with the neighbor kid on the living room floor, and handed them a stack of PLAYBOYS.

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